Friday, June 25, 2010

Gen. McChrystal

Okay, so after hearing the name McChrystal over and over again on NPR I have this to say. The problem with actually listening to the news for an hour is the news assumes u will listen for 5 minutes and then turn right back to Jack 93.1 to hear "Feels like the First Time" by Foreigner for the 150,000th time (which is my usual course of action). Thus I had to hear the announcement that McChrystal was "let go" 20 times, and then each time I had to hear it presented like it was the first time they said it. I already have to pretend my mother isn't retelling me the same stories on the phone, so my patience in the repetition department is limited.

My overarching thought on this matter is that McChrystal's name is just so wrong. He should have changed it. Here is a man who could take down those three people who blew the buses down the street in Superman 2 and who skips breakfast and lunch WITHOUT having a slim fast, course I had a friend who did that and called it crash dieting...but anyway the point is he's disciplined and tougher than I or most anyone I know will ever be. But this name is just unpleasant on the ears.

Now when McChrystal was growing up, this name was probably fine. However, then the 80s happened and everyone went so Crystal, (Krystle, Krystal) crazy (krazy, crazeee.)
There was _The Dark Crystal_, Krystal Jennings Carrington (not to be confused with William Jennings Bryant [no relation]) and Crystal light.
The name implies shiny chandeliers, written-for-profit mystical children's entertainment, wine glasses and trampy blondes. This is no name for a General. I mean even Judy Benjamin had an army ready last name. What is even worse is the Mc infront of it. It sounds like a McDonald's menu item. Which now they can't use it as a food item name thanks to this silly crisis.
Why did this man go to _Rolling Stone_? You don't see Beyonce on CSpan. The sad truth is he was bound for flaky behavior, after all his name is simply the Scottish derivative of anything luminescent and light....


1 comment:

  1. I love you.
    P.S. Do you think he became so tough in an effort to live down his shiny Scottish name?
    P.P.S (or is is P.S.S.?) I hope he doesn't read this because he will kick your ass.

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